Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Fast(er) Track Peer Review

(New York, NY) - BREAKING: Following the recent announcement of a fast-track peer-review option at Scientific Reports, competing journals are pleased to announce their own revolution.

For just $749, authors can now opt-in to ReviewWare's RPS [rock–paper–scissors] peer-review track, which decides each scientific manuscript's fate by a single game of rock–paper–scissors* between the Corresponding Author and a qualified External Referee.
Source: Science Daily

Games Reviews will be conducted over Skype with an editor / adjudicator. To maintain anonymity, the external reviewer will be required to wear a glove. To accommodate increasing requests for double-blind peer review, the author selected to take part in the rock–paper–scissors duel can also choose to be gloved, thus masking his or her "identity."
Should the peer-review process result in the authors' Paper being shredded by the reviewer's Scissors (or their Rock wrapped in Paper, or their Scissors blunted by Rock), then a small additional fee allows authors to select our enhanced "Best-of-Three!" peer-review option.

Following this rigorous new review process does not obviate successfully-reviewed authors from paying standard journal processing fees. No one's that lucky.

*For an additional $100, authors can choose the more interactive "Bear Ninja Cowboy" package. Costumes cost extra.

Confused? Check the date.


  1. What if I want the more detailed review - Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock?

  2. From the future:
    "NY Times Rock-Paper-Scissors Interactive Implicated in Fast Track Peer Review Scandal"